The Sweet Spot

I think I have reached a sweet spot in child rearing. Henry now sleeps through the night consistently, naps consistently and doesn't freak out randomly. He has tantrums, but they are manageable and somewhat predictable. He can feed himself, let me know when he needs a diaper change, doesn't freak out when being changed or bathed. He doesn't throw fits in the car and can entertain himself for short periods. He can walk, rides in the stroller willingly and can communicate his needs very well. He interacts with other children, doesn't hit them, steal toys and shares very well. He can participate in toddler activities so we can do more things.

How long can honeymoon phase possibly last?

What the heck does this mean?

Whenever you ask Henry what his name is, he says "Dada" and laughs hysterically. I have a bracelet that says Henry and he reads that as Dada as well. I thought he didn't refer to himself yet, other than to say mine. Now I realize that he puts Dada before most things: Dada spilled, Dada's brush...Should I interpret this as "There's a spill and There's a Brush" or "Henry spilled and Henry's brush?" What a nut.

Yowza.

I looked at the ticker on the top of this blog recently and realized that I have less than 100 days to go before Baby S #2 is born. Into the double digits.

A second pregnancy is totally different than the first. Of course I am thrilled and excited and can't wait to meet the baby. But I am less eager to get the show on the road so to speak. Perhaps it is that I know what is to come this time and are less dreamy-eyed about the whole process. Excruciating pain coupled with weeks of indignity afterward. Sleepless nights and nursing around the clock. Being housebound for weeks. Of course I say all of this tongue in cheek, I wouldn't have given up any of this because it gave us our Henry. But you still do think about it.

I am more afraid of having two children than anything else. How will I divide my time? Will Henry be upset? The old cliche of how will I love a second child as much as my first? How will I possibly get two babies onto the subway?

What will we do with Henry when I go into labor? You can't exactly schedule labor into a convenient, predictable time. What if it is before my mom gets here? What if we have to leave in the middle of the night, will Henry be scared when he wakes up? How can I sleep out of the house for two nights when I have never left him before? He has barely ever had a babysitter, let alone be left for hours on end without either one of us...How can I concentrate on giving birth and getting to know a new baby when I will be so worried about my first?

Just to let you know what a nut I am, I have actually contemplated using the birthing center at the hospital so that I don't have to stay afterward. And then I remember that you can't get an epidural there and quickly put that out of my mind. Apparently the thought of searing pain without drugs overrides my fears :)

Just wanted to share my current state of mind: Sheer panic.

Toddlers getting their fix

Henry still uses a pacifer. We have set a tentative cut off date of his second birthday, but we'll see how that goes. Anytime I have tried to take it away from him his hands go immediately into his mouth. I find that far more disgusting so we give it back. He likes to have it in the car and in the stroller, and it helps him fall asleep at night. As soon as he is sleeping he spits it out.

He has a few friends that have been weaned from their pacifiers, apparently prematurely. Whenever they see Henry with his they immediately try to pull it from his mouth or his hand and shove it into theirs. We saw a friend on the sidewalk today and she actually chased the carriage down trying to get the spare that he carries in his hand. She shoved it in her mouth and started to suck on it like someone smoking their last cigarette. The mother was trying to persuade her to give it up and it just caused her to suck on it harder and faster. It was amazing to watch, she really was getting her fix while it lasted!

I was just outsmarted by a 22 month old

Henry and have been playing in his room after his nap. He wanted me to put him in his crib. He will then want to be lifted in and out so that he can throw things or jump up and down. Nothing good could come of it.I told him no several times and he walked over very deliberately (but with no anger) and proceeded to swing at me. I said, "Henry, no hitting. Do you want to go in your crib?" (his normal punishment for hitting)

He smiled at me and said "Yes!"

They don't teach this stuff in the books...

We are at a cross-roads with potty training. Not to be graphic, but we have awareness before the fact, dislike of diapers, interest in the toilet (well, flushing the toilet) and ability to pull down pants. However, we have no interest in actually sitting on the actual seat.

Tonight was a normal night, Henry fought putting a new diaper on, preferring to run around in the altogether. I finally pinned him down and slapped a diaper on him. He cried and pleaded and tried to rip it off. I explained the simple fact to him that if wanted to wear underwear I would be happy to buy him some. But, it also meant that he would have to stop relieving himself on the carpet and then giggling.

He yessed me to death but still tried to rip off the diaper. Clearly he was ready for the underwear "right then." Hmm, I was going to have to improvise. I whipped out a pair of Adam's boxers and handed them to him. He refused my offer to help him, and tried to wrestle them on himself. After a few minutes he came back for my assistance. I put them on him and of course they fell right off. Feeling satisfied with his victory, he stepped out of them and walked away.

They really need to update those parenting books, I think they skipped this particular chapter.

Dere Da Bus!

I have been waiting and waiting for Henry to string words together. I am sure he has done so before now, I just can't understand what he is saying because he has his own little language. I haven't worried (much) up until this point because he knows a ton of words, is very expressive, and understands EVERYTHING we say.

He said something yesterday which we forgot to write down that we were convinced was a sentence. So I will log today's amazing achievement. We were out and about and Henry pointed and exclaimed "Dere Da Bus!" Just to confirm I asked him if that was what he said. He said "yes" which is a rare occurence in itself, so there you go. Yes Henry, there's the bus.

Grateful.

Periodically, Henry still wakes at some point during the night and wants to come into our bed. Since his father is such a huge softie on this point, he is allowed. Last night, he was in there before I was.

I laid down and I felt Baby S #2 start to kick me, as it normally does at night. At the same moment, I felt Henry's warm, chubby little foot lodge into my back and start to kick me as well.

It occured to me then that there were so many times I laid in bed and wondered if we would ever have one baby to love. The fact that we have been given two is just unbelievable to me and I am so grateful.

Funny Little Henry-isms

Henry is just on the cusp of really being able to talk. He knows a ton of words, but is really just starting to string them together. Most of what he says that is not single words sounds like jibberish. He has made up his own signs and gestures for things that he wants to do, but doesn't know how to say. For example, he has this elaborate arm swinging gesture with a shooshing noise when he wants to pour something. Or, he pretends to chew if he sees me with gum. When he wants me to chase him he runs in place.

He runs really fast but keeps one arm cocked and swings it wildly. It looks hilarious.

Whenever anyone walks into the house, he can't rest until they take their shoes off. He will follow them around badgering them until they do.

When Adam comes or goes, if he gives Henry a kiss first Henry makes sure he gives me one too. Way to have my back kid!

Same thing with sharing. Anything he gets a bite or sip of he makes sure is offered to "Mama"

He loves to jump now with both feet and actually gets some air. I'm sure the apartment below us is thrilled with this new development.

He tries to dress himself but everything winds up going over his arms first. Today he was running around with his shorts on his arms.

He has a very elaborate bathroom routine, which includes wiping the seat. Mind you he won't actually use the toilet.

He mimics everything Adam does, from the hair product he uses to putting on deodorant. He dries off just like Dad and taps his toothbrush to shake off the water.

He does a little wave in restaurants when he wants to ask for the check. That one kills me

When he wants something that you have, like a sip of your coffee, he brings it over to you for a sip and then makes this hopeful little face and smacks his lips.

Catching Up

Sorry for the long hiatus since my last post. Since we last spoke lots has happened.

We went on our Second Annual Schnell Family vacation to Montauk in the beginning of August. We stayed at The Surf Club, the same place we did last year. We had a wonderful time, barring the fact that Henry had a very high fever and was just not himself the first few days. Our poor little guy who is normally such a flexible traveler had such a hard time. He was clearly uncomfortable but wouldn't take his medicine. He also wouldn't sleep in his bed so we spent the entire week getting jammed in the solar plexus by his tiny but very strong foot.

Vacations certainly have a different flavor than they did in the past. The schedule is dictated by meals and naps, and the whims of a very tiny dictator. One day he might love the sand and water, the next day forget about it. There doesn't seem to be any rhyme or reason.

We have also just come out of another phase of fairly bad separation anxiety. In mid-July, we had to leave Henry out at my brother's house while we went to a wedding. Although we came back that night, we have never actually left him somewhere before. The very few times he has had a sitter has been at our house.

To say that he took it hard was an understatement. Kevin and Julie said he was fairly inconsolable for almost an hour after we left. After that he just sulked on the couch. Once they left to do some activities he cheered up, but the aftermath has been unpleasant. Until just this past week, he has been terrified of us leaving. Poor Adam was having to leave for work with Henry going into absolute hysterics. He has not really wanted to play with his friends, either at our house or theirs. When I would bring him to the park he would beg to go home or just refuse to get off my lap. It was so sad to witness, it is almost like he was going through a little life crisis. He seems to be coming out of it, but he is still not totally back to normal.

He is so much more little boy now than he was. He can put on his own shoes, wants to help dress himself, is very interested in the toilet and loves to play with little cars and trains. He is learning new words every day and is just growing up before our eyes every day. He also has such a good sense of humor and is a lot of fun to be around.