Wednesday, August 19, 2009

Uh-Oh

Molly is pulling herself to a standing position on the couch now. Lord help me!

What a Glorious Day!

I had a follow up at the oral surgeon this morning, so I decided to hit the Central Park Zoo with the kids afterward b/c it is nearby (and we are members, so it was free).

We were having a grand time in the park; Henry was skipping along and taking pictures of leaves with his kiddie camera. Cue horror music...

Well, it was 92 degrees and I had a sweaty, teething, napless baby in a carrier on my chest and a black backpack on my back. Sweltering was not the word. I also had no stroller.

Henry kicked it off by refusing to pose for the photographer at the gate and telling me he wanted to go home.

He then kvetched for snacks (snack bar still closed) but poo-poohed the snacks I had. He then ate a few while watching the sea-lions, smeared banana all over my pants and then was deliberately dropping cheerios on the steps. I "corrected" him twice before he decided mash them under his sandal. I picked up his foot and he fell to the ground crying as if I had pushed him . He then laid there crying (literally) and saying he didn't like the zoo. The lady next to me gave me a dirty look as if I had smacked him or something.

He demanded to be carried (remember I was carrying Molly and a backpack) but then loudly complained that I was "hurting his pee-nus." He complained or cried through the snow leopards, the polar bears and penguins. In that one he was also scared of the dark and was mad that he couldn't touch them through the glass.

I tried to recover by buying him an 11am ice pop. It was going fine until I tried to pose him with Molly on the bench. He took his arm off her shoulders, she tipped sideways and rolled headfirst off the back of the bench. I caught her by her feet before she hit the ground but she wasn't too happy. When he finished his ice-pop and demanded a second and then was crying for me to buy him a toy I decided to pack it in.

He refused to walk so I was carrying him out of the park. He saw the cafe was now open and of course wanted to stay. There was no way I could get them back to the subway without having a nervous breakdown. I spotted a pedi-cab at the exit of the zoo. (A man on a bike with a cart attached).

How fun I thought. A nice breezy ride through the park! Hmm, the man decided to take Central Park South and fight the traffic. We had busses and garbage trucks barrelling behind us. He had a severe case of sweaty body odor and we were down wind. Henry cried that he was scared the entire time but then perked up the last 30 seconds when he saw the Globe in front of Trump Tower. Now he can't wait to "tell Daddy what fun he had!"

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Please Excuse My Monkey

I have made lots of great friends since having Henry. I have always worked with men, so hanging out all day with mostly women is a big change for me. All of the women I have met are smart, great moms and a lot of fun to be around. They have all been successful in their own right before hopping off the career track to stay home with their kids. I certainly could not stay home all day with small children if it were not for their company.

However, the addition of tiny, ill-mannered tyrants adds certain etiquette dilemmas. You can be having a perfectly nice conversation that is interrupted by the fact that their child is swinging a golf club at your son's head. Or, your child is spilling fruit juice on their couch. Sitting at dinner and someone hurls a tiny shoe at the waiter. At a playdate, your child has not napped and is acting like John McEnroe? How do you get past this? Pretend it isn't happening? Look the other way? It really is quite amusing and certainly not in Emily Post.

Mama!

Molly has started babbling recently and now says Mamamamamamama all day long. Especially when she wants out of her car seat, to be picked up. So sweet but sad at the same time!

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Mortified!

I had the distinct pleasure of bring Henry and Molly to the dentist Monday. Adam met me there to watch them in the lobby and then was headed straight to the airport to go to Atlanta. Afterward, I was just waiting for the doctor to give me a referral form so Adam ran out to catch his plane. Henry was a bit punchy, but nothing extreme. All of a sudden the office went dark (entire lobby and hallways.) My dear boy was over by the light switch grinning like a Chesire Cat. I hollered at him, put him in time out and the second he was sprung from the pokey he did it AGAIN.

Sunday, we were driving home from Boston and stopped at Friendly's for lunch. Henry was hollering "Poopy is coming!" as Adam was carrying him to the bathroom and then was yelling "Mommy, I want the poopy ice cream!" over Adam's shoulder I think Adam wanted to crawl into a hole.

Can you say embarrassed?

A Sign of My Sad Social Life

Adam has been travelling a lot for work lately so I have been holding down the fort solo quite a bit. Needless to say, I am pretty tired from the 24x7 shenanigans of the Dynamic Duo.

I had some sort of infected gum that I needed to go to the dentist for on Monday. He referred me to an oral surgeon to look at a weird bump on my lip. Adam was flying home this afternoon so I scheduled the appointment for 4pm today.

How sad is it that I was actually EXCITED to go to the oral surgeon? Not even the threat of mouth cancer (I kid) could dampen my spirits of getting out of Dodge. Alone. I left a full hour early despite the fact that it would take me 30 minutes tops. I was practically giddy packing my reading material for the subway and the waiting room. Uninterupted reading time? Walking somewhere without a small child strapped to my chest in the ninety degree heat? Bliss!

Not to worry, I am fine. Even though I have 5 stiches in my mouth, the very kind surgeon was good enough to give me a little shot of valium to knock me out when he removed the bump. Best sleep I have had in weeks!

Clearly I need to get out more!

Where Oh Where Oh Where Is Molly...

There is a song that I have always sang to Molly since she was a newborn that she really loves. It starts "Where oh where oh where is Molly..." Since Molly is now a lightening fast crawler the song is particularly appropriate. Here are some recent sightings...

In the dining room chewing a piece of used gum that Henry dropped on the carpet
In the foyer sucking on a penny
Under the dining room table
Sitting on the bottom shelf of the wall unit hurling books over her shoulder
In the bathroom, squeezing herself next to the toilet to grab the toilet brush, plunger and extra toilet paper
Underneath the coffee table
Trying to work her way into the pantry where we keep the mops, recycling etc.

I need to order some eyes for the back of my head with this one.